January 21st....

......Is going to be the best way to start off 2009.

It's Yours, The World In the Palm of Your Hand

So I got my first parking ticket yesterday.
Apparently parking on a side street between 9 and 5:30 for more than two hours requires a 25 dollar fine. I could see if I'd parked there, backwards or with my front end half on the road. But no. I was parked like a normal person would park.
Is our society seriously that greedy that it won't allow people to park on their own street, a hundred (maybe less) feet away from their own house, for more than two hours? Where the fuck is the point in owning a car if you can't park in places that should be parked in? I would love to be able to take a transit bus or a cab to point B. But with the rising cost of bus fares, and the overpowering smell in taxi cabs, I choose not to. Maybe I'll just write a letter to the city.


"City Of Winnipeg,

Gofuckyourself.

Sincerely, TJ Morand"

But in all honesty. I've never been in a cab that doesn't smell like a cat died in the glovebox two months earlier. It's not even the East Indian drivers who smell that bad contrary to popular belief. It's all of them. White, black, asian, east indian, alien or whatever else. It's horrible. I can pick up when my armpits smell, in maybe four seconds after they start smelling. But these people drive around all day in a contained box of their own stench, how do they not know?
It's almost like a riddle.

PS.
Somebody buy me those Wu Tang boots.




Headphones...
Pastor Troy

Cash Rules Everything Around Me, CREAM Get The Money, That's Right Go Get Yours Dummy!

It's weird, nothing really pissed me off today? Am I normal now?

Oh wait, I stepped in water. Because our fridge is broken. Why you may ask? Because our landlord is a fucking moron.

And I also got irritated with some guy I saw in the mall wearing those cool guy shades and an off-center hollister polo thing (un-popped, thank god), and the tightest gold chain around his neck. That made me remember why I hate going to the mall. But then I had New York Fries and realized why I keep returning.


I don't think I'm in a bad enough mood to write anything good right now.

Fuck It




Headphones
Ready To Die

December Twenty Fifth Now Thought The Birth Of Christ Was Saturnalia When Men Got Drunk Fucked Eachother And Beat Their Wife

UFC is the most gay thing I have ever seen. Two guys, in a very greasy and sweaty cage, tackling eachother and getting all up on one another. Both with the same jock-douchebag mentallity and the same barbed wire and tribal tattoos that look they were done in their friends meth lab. Probably also wearing some kind of Tapout or Affliction shirt. Sounds just about as gay as Clay Aiken.

The best is when those guys take themselves to a bar and walk around with a pissed off look and stare you right in the eye when they walk past you. They also always end up leaving with the one girl with the platinum blonde hair, who's wearing a pink mesh-back hat and those black highwaisted sweats/tights/whatever they are. They'll usually say "Badass" or "Sexy" across the ass. But in reality they should just say "Wear No Cover, Come Right In".

UFC fans who are reading this, how have you not realized how lame it is. There's usually one punch thrown, the rest is just submission moves and leglocks, which happen to be two of the gayest sounding words that relate to wrestling or fighting.

I met some guy who actually liked this shit and he honestly said one time, "Oh yeah he beat the shit out of him in that PPV!" But what actually happened, one of the guys threw a punch, the other guy ducked, then went straight up to him and put him in a hold, then they rolled around and hugged, then they got tired and one guy "won"........
Wow that definately is some ultimate fighting....!

I have to go to work.



Headphones...
Ras Kass

Last night I had a dream that I shit my pants. And today that almost happened.

Speaking of shit..

Everytime I hear the words "Cindy Klassen is a hometown hero!" I want to vomit. She's not a hero. She's the furthest thing from a hero. When did we start depicting athletes as Gods. "Wow that Micheal Phelps is my hero because he can swim fast!" He's not a hero either. Just because somebody can swim fast or skate fast, doesn't mean they should be making millions of dollars and getting streets named after them. Athletes can't be heroes, they do nothing to better society or help someone. How come people can't realize who the real heroes are? Teachers, doctors, firemen or (some) police officers. My grandma's a teacher and has helped hundreds of kids learn how to read, write and count. How come she doesn't get a fucking street named after her. I would rather look up to her than some bitch who can skate fast.

I'm done.

Chills.

Who would've thought.

In The Country Of The Blind, The One Eyed Man Is King

I've seen enough shitty Joker costumes to keep me pissed off until next hallowe'en. What I loved most is how every single one of the people I saw dressed as The Joker didn't know shit about Batman. Trust me, I asked hoping to find one, just one fellow fan.. But I got nothing but a bunch of douchebags who think that "Heath Ledger is the shit, even if he did fuck that guy in Brokeback Mountain".. I hope Heath Ledger comes back from the dead and rapes you.

In other Hallowe'en related hatred. How come October 31st is starting to turn into "Dress like a tramp Day"? Almost every girl I saw dressed up had a miniskirt/short shorts, and their tits flopping out of their shirt. I'm not saying that it's demeaning or I'm disgusted. I'm not a male feminist like some people we may or may not know... But I am intrigued as to how girls just think it's cool to dress like that and feel no shame. Maybe next year I'll throw on a black open robe, a white collar and a pair of briefs with my johnson hanging out of the side and say I'm a slutty priest.

If you drank a 26 of rum on any other night of the year wearing a cape and leather tights, people might think you're a crazy alcoholic. But if you do it on October 31st then who fuckin cares hey?
Nobody even goes trick or treating past eight anymore. Everyone is so scared of poison candy and pedophiles, which go hand in hand apparently.

I'm planning on spending next years hallowe'en on my roof with a bucket full of eggs so I can throw them at who ever is dressed up as the Joker again.

Bedtime.


Headphones..
RJD2